Biking helped USA Paralympian Freddie De Los Santos with PTSD, and now he sees his incapacity as a blessing

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Editor’s notice: The next story consists of mentions of suicidal ideas. In the event you or anybody you already know is battling suicidal ideas, the Nationwide Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255 and the Veterans Disaster Line is 1-800-273-8255 (press 1), and you may textual content HELLO to 741741 to succeed in the Disaster Textual content Line. 

When somebody first instructed doing a marathon to Freddie De Los Santos, he thought they had been making enjoyable of him.

De Los Santos, now 51, was being handled at a navy hospital following a rocket assault whereas he was serving in Afghanistan in 2009. Resulting from his accidents, surgeons needed to amputate his proper leg above the knee.

What De Los Santos didn’t know on the time was they had been severe and that he might do it with a handcycle. It was the beginning of a brand new journey from the Dominican Republic-born rider that might lead him to develop into a part of Staff USA’s Paralympic squad in Tokyo.

“I signed as much as do the marathon with a handcycle and it took me like three hours,” De Los Santos advised VeloNews from the Staff USA resort in Japan. “After the marathon, I couldn’t transfer for 2 weeks and I used to be like, I’ll by no means try this once more. However guess what occurred? The following yr I signed up for the Boston Marathon and that’s after I realized, wow, I simply did a marathon and that’s fairly spectacular.”

Two members of our #FreedomTeam of Wounded Veterans, Freddie De Los Santos and Tom Davis, are wrapping up a coaching camp in hopes of representing Staff USA in Tokyo.

Subsequent up, Huntsville AL – a Paralympic Qualifier. #Tokyo2021 #Paralympics pic.twitter.com/A7zL7uNizQ

— Shifting Gears United (@Team_SGU) March 20, 2021

After that first race, De Los Santos had caught the biking bug and he took half in a number of occasions organized for service members. He additionally began using socially and was ultimately persuaded to compete in a rising variety of occasions.

“I used to be getting sooner and so I began doing like nationwide and native races. And it began to be a part of my rehab after which it grew to become a ardour. After which that keenness grew to become a lifestyle. That journey, that keenness turned out to be knowledgeable profession. It’s bizarre,” he laughed.

In addition to serving to him bodily get better, taking over biking has aided De Los Santos mentally as effectively. Being “blown up” in Afghanistan and shedding a limb has had an enduring affect on him, as has the lack of a number of of his pals and comrades throughout fight excursions in Afghanistan and Iraq.

When he returned to America for therapy following the incident, he needed to cope with plenty of ache and trauma. Biking has been a approach of processing that and changing into an lively member of his group in Hopewell Junction, New York.

It has additionally allowed him to see his incapacity not as a limitation however as one thing good.

“Biking has develop into my coping mechanism to cope with my anxiousness, my PTSD. So, that sense, it has given me a brand new lifestyle,” De Los Santos stated. “It has been essentially the most rewarding expertise to have the ability to compete at this stage, regardless of my incapacity.

“Once I received wounded, I used to be very suicidal. I used to be in a hospital for 2 years and I just about needed to discover ways to speak, how one can stroll, and achieve self-confidence. So, I had plenty of issues as a result of I remoted myself from everyone, I used to be very aggressive. I used to be taking plenty of treatment.

“Twelve years in the past, I used to be going by the worst time of my life and now I can say that my incapacity has been a blessing. It sounds humorous, however to me, it has been a blessing as a result of I’ve a special perspective about life. I’m nearer to God, I’ve a greater relationship with my household, and I’m in one of the best form of my life. Biking has helped me to include myself in society in very constructive methods, socially, mentally, and bodily.”

Turning into an artist and going for gold

Biking isn’t the one exercise that De Los Santos has used to maneuver on from essentially the most troublesome interval of his life. Throughout his restoration, he additionally picked up portray and images after somebody from the Veterans Affiliation instructed he participate in artwork remedy.

De Los Santos has at all times had an inventive aspect as he skilled and labored as a graphic designer earlier than becoming a member of the navy, however he didn’t need to do it. He needed to be satisfied to take a category however it has develop into one other ardour of his and he has used it as a approach of exhibiting his family and friends among the emotions he has struggled to say out loud.

“By some means they satisfied me as a result of I didn’t need to go,” De Los Santos advised VeloNews. “I used to be very suicidal, and I tried suicide just a few occasions, so the artwork remedy was going to be good for me.

“I didn’t need to inform my household what I used to be going by. I felt like I’ve a demon within me and I couldn’t do away with that demon and I couldn’t speak to my household and my children and my group. I needed them to know, however I used to be afraid to allow them to know, verbally. So, my portray grew to become a approach for me to precise myself. The extra I used to be portray, the higher I used to be feeling.

“I used to be in a position to put all my nightmares, my perception, my frustration, all the pieces I went by after I was in Iraq and Afghanistan.”

As time has moved on, De Los Santos’ work have modified of their content material. There’s nonetheless some ache, however different themes are creating. By means of it, his household has been in a position to perceive what he has been feeling, too.

Friday’s handcycle relay‼️

Congratulations once more to Will Groulx, Ryan Pinney and Freddie de los Santos. pic.twitter.com/KhKyVTeR7G

— U.S. Paralympics Biking (@usparacycling) June 30, 2019

De Los Santos’ household is a giant a part of his life and has performed a giant position in his new profession as knowledgeable athlete.

“They’re so excited,” De Los Santos stated. “My spouse is my greatest coach. My son is 22, my daughter is 26 and they’re so pleased with me. They are saying “dad, you’re wonderful”. I don’t see myself like that, however they’re at all times pampering me. They’re at all times combating to take me to the airport, in addition they look out for me. My son works at a motorbike store, the place they repair my bike. So, he’s at all times on high of my gear, ensuring all the pieces’s good.”

The Tokyo Video games are De Los Santos’ second Paralympics after he made his debut on the Rio Paralympics in 2016.

In Brazil, he took fourth within the street race and seventh within the time trial within the H5 class, however he has gained much more expertise since then and he desires much more this time round. He will probably be racing the identical occasions in Tokyo on Tuesday and Wednesday subsequent week.

“My intention is to win gold. I’ve been coaching actually laborious for these races arising,” he stated. “My self-confidence is fairly excessive, and my gear has been upgraded. Bodily, mentally, I really feel unimaginable.

“Since Rio, I grew to become extra tactically higher when it comes to racing, I dropped like 25 kilos. So I’m fitter. I had so many World Cups, so I’ve plenty of expertise.”